restless

Yesterday, the family was told that it would be 24-48 hours. It would be very surprising if she made it to Friday. She is now officially in hospice care at the hospital and is pretty much sedated and only being given morphine for pain. They said she moans really loud. Brenda can't even go in the room anymore. I have hardly slept the last few nights. I'm anxious. When I am able to sleep, it's really restless and I keep waking up, thinking I've missed a call from them. I was talking about it with some people I work with and that's how they are all sleeping too. At least I'm not the only one. Last night, I was sleeping pretty good until like 1:30 and I woke up from some horrible nightmare. I can't even remember what it was about. I just remember sitting straight up, feeling panicked. I tried to stretch and I couldn't feel my right arm. I was still half asleep and I started to freak out, thinking I didn't have an arm or something lol. I was failing around and it scared the cat off lol. Oh man. It's pretty funny now. But when you wake up at 1:30 in the morning thinking you don't have an arm, it was pretty scary. lol. I finally realized that my arm was still attached to my body, I had just been laying on my right side since I fell asleep (I guess?) and it was completely numb. Hurt real bad when the blood started flowing pretty good through it. Anyway. I turned the TV on to watch some info-commercials and ended up falling asleep with the TV on. I got some good sleep then but I still feel really tired. But I guess I had an eventful night so it's ok. lol. Anyway. I just had to share my funny story.